Thursday, September 13, 2012

Day 17 :: Make or Break?

The disapproving looks I got from the girls in the office today when I walked in with a coffee, well, they spoke volumes. STELLA!!! They cried. Yes I know, but this week I’m totally feeling overwhelmed.

This cleanse and food has totally, 100% gotten me through the last couple of weeks. I would not be in the shape I am now having not had it. Amazing. But this week is hard. I’ll be honest. I want some freedom. I want a coffee. I feel like I’m being pulled in a lot of directions and I know it’s probably because it’s that time of the month but hell, gimme a break.

I am totally realising that as I’m on this, I’m more and more going to stay with this way of eating. But to do so, I need balance. I am not good with all or nothing longterm. It makes me want to rebel. And so coffee, that’s my rebellion.
Interesting.

Food is kicking along. I'm eating it, loving having it mixed up, and honestly am enjoying some more cooked foods in my diet. I know that a lot of raw stuff is helping my digestion, but me, I like texture and mixing it up and not just crunchy raw stuff day in and day out.

Flavours? That magic food fairy, Angie, is heaven. She has the amazing knack to create stuff that I couldn't even dream of. But it was interesting to talk to her and we both said how we were struggling this week. I guess any concerted effort is hard, and the key thing throughout this cleanse for me was to acknowledge the feelings and the living. I can eat brown rice and still not be 'well'. It's taking care of body, soul and mind that will create change.

So yes, today again was hard. Cravings, tiredness, sadness. Not about anything in particular, but just life. The up's and down's.

I'm trying to work, teach, and study all at once, and there's finite time and I'm reaching the end of it. Sleep is a priority for me, so I've not been practicing nearly as much as I would love to. But that's ok. There's give and take in all of this and eating well, sitting down to breathe, and to get to bed on time is what I'm focussing on. And a coffee here and there, heck, if that's the worst I've done in this few weeks, I'm ok with that :)

PS - check out my afternoon snack though - FAVOURITE EVER!!!!

1 comment:

svasti said...

I LOVE my coffee. I limit how much I drink, but I don't deny myself something I love. Even my naturopath is cool with my limited coffee intake. :)

Sugar is different however. I've gone off that and don't miss it at all. I've pretty much given up chocolate all together. Ice cream is a thing of the past.

So I think we have to find a happy balance and be okay with that. Personally, I don't think of the way I eat now as a diet - more as the way of eating that keeps me in good health.

Which is (some) meat eating, lots of fresh natural whole foods (some cooked, some raw), and some coffee.

It works for me.

Hope you feel better soon!

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