Monday, March 24, 2008

Glad for the Grief

For what is it to die, but to stand in the sun and melt into the wind. Khalil Gibran

I attended my first funeral ever last week. Lucky - as I've been around a few decades and have not had to go to one before. But unlucky - as obviously someone close to me lost someone who was so instrumental and precious to them.

I went through a rough time, trying to process all of these emotions. I mean - when people pass away, what is left? Why did they go? What am I doing to live my life better? What does life mean??? So many questions, so few answers, and it's only now that I can look back on the time of the passing, the funeral, and what/where I am right now.

I am quite shocked at my reaction to this time. I felt very very helpless on many levels. But now I am - to coin a phrase from SARK - glad for the grief. She sums it up best, in this newsletter:
I’m grieving, of course, and riding the waves of feelings that come with it. I’m glad for this grief because it deepens me and makes me grow. Even in the worst, raging loneliness and despair, there is growth. Of course, I am also not glad at all about the grief all the time. Sometimes I hate it, resist it, and want to run so fast and far away from it, and I think I can somehow escape. Acceptance of deep grief is part of my process. I am learning to “lean in” to the pain without dwelling there.

I just don’t think we hear enough about the gifts of death, gladness in grief, or transforming pain. Loss and change are part of all of our lives, and, as much as there is great sadness, there is also great gladness...

Here are a couple of stories and links for you to check out - here, here and here.

Namaste, x

1 comment:

Nadine Fawell said...

Grief is difficult. Ithink it is better to feel it raw than not fell it properly; there really is a lot of learning that comes from loss!

Take good care Stella.

xxx

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